A new beginning

Today i start a chronical of my journey into submission. i am a submissive male who has had many experiences in the world of BDSM, some good, some bad but none totally fulfilling. i have found one dominant to have captured my attention and someone i feel worthy of my submission. Submission and the giving of the self isn't something to take lightly. Nor is the taking of someone's submission a small matter. It is because of this mutual understand that i submit to Miss Shola.

i didn't begin this journey today, its been in process for a while. i will post the recent posts from my facebook and their dates here for the sake of some context.

March 13, 2013
Today i removed all barriers, and all secrecy from my Mistress Shola Findomme. i feel the dawn of a new beginning that will allow me to take my submission to new depths with Mistress, as well as use Her wise counsel in my personal life. Maybe this is full life control that i've wondered about in bdsm, but never really experienced.

March 14, 2013
Today's theme was definitely "Mindgames" with the beautiful Mistress Shola Findomme. Moments of calm interspersed with moments where my heart beat hard and rapidly - felt played much like an instrument in Her hands. All worthwhile when the final moments of the day were spent in the presence of Her beauty on Skype. i recommend all slaves who enjoy mental sadism to taste her sweet poison.

March 18, 2013
Eliminating all the garbage and useless baggage in my life in the form of stupid dommes and serving the beautiful Mistress Shola Findomme. Maybe its good to purge during my "in consideration" status. Don't want any remnants when i'm fully owned by Her.

March 20,2013
Thank You Mistress Shola Findomme for forgiving me and accepting me as Your pet. I'm beyond happy and feel very connected to You. i have no secrets from You. What You want from me is Yours already.

March 20th - first day of spring. Truly a special day for me and maybe not coincidental that it is the time of rebirth in nature. The deceptions of the past were forgiven. i was forgiven for all my lies, for my rudeness, and truly ignorant behaviour. She forgives, but not without mindgames as i wrote about on the 14th of March.  By the 20th of March i felt very repentent, my heart and inner being ached from wronging Her and the guilt was eating me inside. i begged Her for it and she forgave and she collared me as Her tech pet. It was a moment of pure joy. Not only did i become Hers, but the chains of fear and guilt from being forgiven were removed.

On the 21st of March, was the moment that a defining moment for me in my submission. It is one thing to give account access to a dominant for all Your bdsm activities and quite another to give Her access to Your personal account. Knowledge about and access to most of family, my friends, co-workers and aspects of my personal life. For me, that was me signing my life in trust to Her.  It is no small step, no desire of being fetishistically blackmailed,  or  moment of weakness on my part. It was the facing of fear, the faith in a strong dominant woman and the parting of ways from negative cycles to commit to a dominant who can make me a better person - a better slave and in the process enjoy it. In turn, i've found that the work i do for Her isn't a chore like it has for others in the past. i desire to please Her, i desire to do the best i can for Her, i desire to serve Her to make Her happy. It's a paradigm shift. It isn't something i do for someone so i can get something back.

i am changing - my journey has just begun. Not sure where i'm heading, or what i'll be when all is said and done, but i trust my beautiful Mistress - Miss Shola